No Bake Peanuts & Candy Corn Cookies

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No Bake Peanuts & Candy Corn Cookies

Yes, I realize it isn’t October. Yes, I realize Halloween was almost three months ago. Thank you for being concerned.

I wanna bring candy corn back. Why do we relegate it to one month of the year? Candy corn is delicious! It’s nutritious!

No Bake Peanuts & Candy Corn Cookies

Okay, sorry, I get it, I took it too far. But we agree, right? Candy corn is too awesome to only be acceptable snack food for one month?

It’s even more ridiculous to type it out! I’m ashamed of you, humans. How could you let this happen?

No Bake Peanuts & Candy Corn Cookies

I’ll forgive you this one time, if you promise never to do it again. Promise? Pinky swear? Okay. Good. I believe you. Because you’ve probably still got bags of candy corn in the back of your cupboard from when it went on sale the day after Halloween. Holler!

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s focus on the intense combo of candy corn and salted peanuts. Yeah, you know what I’m talking about. Now let’s focus on how fun and easy no bake cookies are. You still with me? Now combine those two together and you’ve finally got it: you’ve finally realized I’m the best robot you could ever have.

No Bake Peanuts & Candy Corn Cookies

No Bake Peanuts & Candy Corn Cookies
makes about 20 cookies
slightly adapted from Sprinkle with Flour

2 tbsp (1/4 stick) unsalted butter
3/4 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup milk
1/2 cup white chocolate chips
1 tsp vanilla extract
1-1/3 cup rolled oats
3/4 cup salted peanuts, coarsely chopped
3/4 cup candy corn, coarsely chopped

1. In a medium-sized saucepan over medium heat, combine the butter, sugar, and milk. Bring to a rolling boil and let cook for one minute. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla extract and white chocolate chips, stirring until smooth. Fold in oats, peanuts, and candy corn. Drop by tablespoons onto wax paper and let set until completely hardened.

No Bake Peanuts & Candy Corn Cookies

Banana Pudding Cupcakes

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Are you a fan of banana pudding? Then I’m now your favorite robot in the world. R2D2 who? HAL? Ha!

The absolutely best part of this recipe is the frosting. Not only is it wonderfully banana-y and pudding-y (just how jealous are you right now of my verbs adjectives?) but the vanilla wafers soften under the layers of frosting and it’s like you’re really eating banana pudding slathered on a cupcake. C3PO? Don’t make me laugh.

I forgot to photograph the insides of the cupcake so you could see the layers of vanilla wafers in the frosting, so here’s an action shot with a human! A human! How rare.

Have you ever watched a human eat a cupcake? It’s like a train wreck you can’t look away from. There’s frosting on noses and crumbs on shirts… I’m definitely a fork advocate. Or spoon, if you wanted to be more historically accurate with the pudding and all.

But I’m hardly ever presently accurate, so just eat these cupcakes however you’d like, even if all the robots in the room cringe and hug the forks closer to their chests.

Vanilla Wafer Cupcakes
makes 12

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
3/4 cup granulated sugar
2 eggs
2 tsp vanilla extract
1-1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1-1/2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 cup milk
1 cup coarsely crushed vanilla wafers

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a muffin tin with baking cups.

2. In a large bowl, cream together butter and sugar. Add eggs, one at a time. Stir in vanilla extract.

3. In a separate, smaller bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder, and salt. Stir in half of this flour mixture to the butter mixture. Mix in milk, and then add the remaining flour mixture, mixing until just combined. Fold in crushed vanilla wafers.

4. Fill baking cups 2/3 of the way full and bake for 18-20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Transfer to a wire rack to cool completely before frosting.

Banana Pudding Frosting
from The Little Kitchen

1 cup milk
1 box (3.4 oz) instant banana pudding
8 oz cream cheese, softened
12 oz Cool Whip, thawed

1. In a small bowl, combine milk and instant pudding. Set aside and let the pudding set.

2. In a large bowl, cream together cream cheese and Cool Whip. Stir in pudding.

3. To assemble: spread a thin layer of frosting on a cupcake. Top with a vanilla wafer, then cover again with another layer of frosting. Repeat once more until you have two layers of vanilla wafers, both frosted. Top with one more vanilla wafer.

Note: this frosting must be kept refrigerated, even after you’ve frosted the cupcakes.

Popovers with Cake Batter Butter

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Well, would you look at what we have here. Baking popovers was on my resolution list! Analysts are predicting this “go-get-’em” attitude will dissipate by tomorrow.

I specifically requested a popover pan for Christmas this year. I’d never even seen a popover in real life but gorgeous photos online were tempting me. But no more! Let the tempted be the the tempter! Or something like that.

But humans, listen. These popovers were so easy to make, and so rewarding! Look at how impressive they are! I feel like a robotic version of Julia Child! It is a bit of the wait game, letting the ingredients come to room temperature and then letting the batter rest for an hour, but that’s why Netflix released all seven seasons of The West Wing on instant. For robots like me, and people like you, who want to bake popovers. So we can watch an episode or two (or… an… entire… season…) during our baking. Thanks, Netflix, for thinking of the bakers. We owe you some popovers.

Oh, and the butter? The butter that I’m claiming tastes like cake batter? It does. It really does. It’s weird. It’s tasty. It’s sooo weirdly tasty.

I’m not saying you should slather this butter on every blueberry muffin in sight. (Or maybe you should.) It’s a novelty butter, used in moderation. It would be perfect for birthday toast! Birthday toast is what all of my friends are getting as gifts this year. Spoiler alert.

makes 12
from Authentic Suburban Gourmet

3-1/2 cups milk
4 cups all-purpose flour
1-1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking powder
6 eggs, room temperature

1. Warm milk in the microwave.

2. Combine flour, salt, and baking powder. Set aside.

3. In the large bowl of a mixer with a whisk attachment, whisk eggs on medium-speed for about 3 minutes, until pale and fluffy. Turn speed down to low and slowly add warmed milk. Gradually add flour mixture and mix until combined. Cover bowl and let rest for one hour.

4. Preheat oven to 450 degrees. Generously spray popover pan with non-stick spray. Fill each popover cup about 2/3 of the way full. Place the popover pan on a cookie sheet to catch any drippings.

5. Bake at 450 degrees for 15 minutes, then reduce the temperature to 375 degrees for the last 15-20 minutes of baking. Popovers should look very golden brown and light and airy. Eat warm.

Cake Batter Butter

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1/4 tsp vanilla extract
1/4 tsp almond extract
2 tsp sprinkles

1. Cream together butter, vanilla extract, and almond extract. Stir in sprinkles. Refrigerate to harden.

Vodka Cupcakes

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Happy New Year, humans! Let’s make some very happy cupcakes. Of the alcohol variety.

Have you got any human New Year’s resolutions? Mine are the following:

1. Bake popovers.
2. Perfect my Bender voice.
3. Build a time machine and go back to the beginning of 2012 because it’s so embarrassing that it’s 2013 and I still don’t have this Bender impression down.

The colors of these cupcakes were inspired by some adorable candy canes I was gifted for Christmas. They’re dessert flavored! Key Lime Pie, Cherry Pie, Banana Cream, and Strawberry Shortcake… now these are candy canes I can bake with.

The cupcakes themselves are very vanilla. A lot of the alcohol burns off and leaves a deep vanilla flavor. You could make these cupcakes with other vodka flavors, but cake vodka just seemed right. And whipped cream vodka in the frosting is perfect.

You’re making these tomorrow for New Year’s Eve, right?

Cake Vodka Cupcakes
makes 16 cupcakes
adapted from Intoxicated Cupcakes

1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
4 eggs
1/2 cup cake vodka
1 tsp vanilla extract
2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup sugar
3-1/2 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp salt

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a muffin tin with baking cups.

2. In a large bowl, combine butter and eggs. (It will look clumpy and runny.) Stir in vodka and vanilla extract.

3. In a separate bowl, whisk together flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt. Gradually add the flour mixture to the butter mixture, mixing until just combined.

4. Fill baking cups 2/3 of the way full. Bake for 18-20 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Transfer to a wire rack to cool completely before frosting.

Option: Brush the tops of the cupcakes with more vodka!

Whipped Cream Vodka Buttercream

1 cup (2 sticks) unsalted butter, softened
3 cups powdered sugar
2 tbsp whipped cream vodka

1. In a large bowl, cream together butter and sugar. Add vodka, one tablespoon at a time. (Add more or less depending on your desired consistency.)

Mexican Chocolate Whoopie Pies

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I haven’t been much in the holiday spirit, if you can’t tell, what with all the pink lemonade and Goldfish ingredients. It just hasn’t felt like Christmas to me. And I blame the cats.

Because of the two hyperactive and nosy cats, it’s not possible to put up a Christmas tree. I wish I could give you photos of eggnogy and nutmegy desserts with those tree lights creating a colorful bokeh effect in the background. But I can’t. I don’t have a tree, or tree lights, or eggnogy and nutmegy desserts. I have cats.

I do have some spicy chocolate whoopie pies for you, too, if you can ever find it in your human heart to forgive me. Go ahead, take a look.

What? You can’t open your chest like a compartment and pull out your heart? That’s so weird. I learn something new about humans everyday.

I used the leftover frosting from the Black Cherry Walnut Cupcakes for my filling and it complimented the whoopie pies perfectly. Of course, that frosting compliments everything perfectly. Even steak and potatoes, probably.

Mexican Chocolate Whoopie Pies
from Piccante Dolce

1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1 cup light brown sugar, packed
1 tsp baking powder
3/4 tsp salt
1-1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
1 tsp chili powder
1 tsp vanilla extract
1 egg
1/2 cup cocoa powder
2-1/3 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup buttermilk

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line a cookie sheet with parchment paper (or Silpat!).

2. In a large bowl, cream together butter and brown sugar. Stir in baking powder, salt, cinnamon, chili powder, and vanilla. Add egg, mixing until combined. Stir in cocoa.

3. Add half of the flour to the mixture, then stir in the buttermilk. Add the remaining flour, mixing until just combined.

4. Scoop tablespoon-sized balls of dough onto the cookie sheet, about 1-1/2 inches apart. Bake for 12-15 minutes, or until the tops spring back when lightly pressed.

5. Let sit on the cookie sheet for a few minutes before transferring to a wire rack to cool completely.

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